Tripping on life…

Life is like a box of chocolates sometimes.  Except my box is like the junkie version.  Some have uppers, some have downers, and some have…well nothing at all.  Personally, each day, I eat about 4-5 pieces…and they are hardly ever the same kind.  Each day is a roller coaster ride like none I’ve ever ridden before.  Sometimes, I wish I got the empty ones more often…then at least I’d just have the sweet taste of chocolate in my mouth.

Business is just about up and running.  Beaurocrazy here is exactly that.  Did you know in order to have a website here, you need a special permit for your web content.  Holy moly! And it takes ages to get it approved.  A country of 1.3 Billion people and it is the most inefficient place.  We always kid that this is how to keep people busy and employed.  Computers would render this work force obsolete. 

Sadly to say, the Asian stereotype is all wrong here.  I’ve never met a lazier bunch.  While I applaud them leaving straight on the dot come 5PM, I would have thought the eight hours in the office would have reaped more results. 

I at least worked 20 hard hours for every 40 in corporate.  Then again, I had a computer and internet to make me look productive the other 20…these people have a calculator…if they are lucky.  It seems to be a rule that when you withdraw money from a bank…say 3,000RMB, the teller has to punch 3,000 into his calculator twice before giving you the money.  I always think that is funny.  He puts in 3,000 and then subtracts it.  HAHA.

I’ve been getting more and more people writing to me about how they envy me or think it was brave for me to quit my job all those years ago to pursue my interests.  It’s been a long five years and I still don’t know how to reply.  Each day sort of meshes into one long day.  I can’t say my life is monotonous.  There are times I wish for it though.  I wish I knew what was happening tomorrow and the next day, or when that fat paycheck, health care, and 401K was going to land on my mailbox. 

The lack of stability has meant a lack of socializing time.  My friends, family, and the life I knew so well are pretty much gone…you’ve all moved on without me.  Then I look at the people still at home and we are all moving apart, even in the same city.  We are all unstable…but I still miss those after work beers with the fellas or dance nights at Good World with the crews, and late night eating at the 69 Restaurant with old friends to dredge up old stories of valor, humility, and shame! 

But in comes a new reign.  Martini Nights at Centro, dancing on the bar at Browns, falling off the bar at Browns.  Hatsune Japanese, Red Cuppa Muesli Breakfasts and the adventures of the psycho taxi drives.  New friends, new adventures.  I think we’ll always want the grass on the other side of the fence.  I learned that long ago, so I stopped looking.  I think my yard is pretty nice.  No grass…but it doesn’t mean I can’t plant any, grow it, fertilize it, and lie on it knowing, my grass may not be greener, but it was all my own doing, for better or for worse…it is up to me to decide.

I had a pretty ordinary day…you know…wake up at 7, get on a conference call at 8, meeting at 9 that I was late for because of the call, another call in the afternoon, accounting, expenses, policy making…dinner meeting…it was a long day so I decided to grab a drink and head home for an early night. 

There is this place called Pavillion near the Worker’s Stadium and I was sitting next to this guy who looked familiar.  His voice was very familiar…his look was familiar.  he said the same thing and we couldn’t quite place one another.  But then a friendly face walked in…Celia…then Yu Lei…then Fei Fei…weird…I didn’t expect to see them there.  The guy I was sitting next to was Steve it turned out he was from San Francisco.  Nope, we didn’t share a drink there.  Did we meet from the Beijing Olympic Committee?  Nope.  Hong Kong. Absolutely not.  Hmm…why did I go to San Fran?  Who do I know there?  Family.  Nope.  But then I recalled…

The years following 1996, I visited California religiously.  My roommates from Taiwan lived there and it was always good to see them.  Two were in Southern California and another in the Bay area, hmm…I told him about "The Love Boat" and he replied that he went on the trip too!!!  I knew it.  His Chinese is too clean, too…Taiwanese.  When I asked?!?!?!  1996…BINGO, that is how I know you.  My roommates and I got into a fight because of this guy.  The fight was memorable because the bad blood between my room and people form Toronto lasted from August until January the next year when a group from New York beat the crap out of the visiting Canadians.  Steve was being defended by the people from Toronto and yet, Steve ended fighting on our side which was pretty funny at the time.  All this beef over Steve and he didn’t want to be defended.  It is very strange just how small the world is.

From Shelton, I met Kevin, whom I met Fei Fei from, Celia is her dear friend and she knew steve.  How weird is this world.  I’m still freaking out about it.  A carefree drink before bed turned into a reunion from thin air.  Cool.

I always hear that it is a horrible film with very little value, yet every time I watch it, it moves me.  Every time I watch the film, or hear a song from it’s soundtrack, it reminds me of those days when I am feeling most alone and unsure about life itself.  I’ll get back to this film in a moment.

I return to the computer after a brief pause from work.  I can’t count how many days my team and I have been working countless hours to get this project off the ground.  We’ve come together as a unit and it is feeling good to work with people again.  No man is an Island.  It took me a while to admit it but I need help.  The truth is we all do and tonight was special because my copy of "About a Boy" was given to me by somebody who keeps my island afloat.  I may not be Bloody Ibiza, but I’d like to think I can be some days.  And she definitely makes it all sunny and all great.

I found moments tonight when I was listening to the dialogue from my office and thinking…that was me very recently..the alone guy…doing my thing without a care in the world.  Never meaning harm, or hurt, but also never really meaning anything, or getting hurt.  I enter a new stage now where the happiness is what it is…here and it requires lots of maintenance. 

So this is my life meaning now…this person who got me something wonderful.  Something to remind me of my old self but also reminding me, it just wasn’t worth it to always be that person, when I could become something better…to challenge the status quo. 

I traveled half way around the world to figure this out, but I couldn’t have done it without her.

So I thought I’d run through a quick comparison.  Christmas has 12 days.  Chinese New Year, 15!  Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus Christ.  CNY celebrates one of twelve different animal emerging from Buddha’s ear, each different, each year unpredictable. 

Christmas you get one day of presents…sometimes, unwanted underwear is delivered in an old ragged stocking with your name on it, CNY you get 1-2 red enveloped with nice sayings in Chinese with nicer bills (MONEY!). 

Christmas food is turkey, a ham, yams, (in my family, we have Christmas Lobster), potatoes with all the trimmings.  On CNY, we have a feast.  One night we go to the father’s side of the family.  Another night, the mother’s side.  Then the siblings.  Then grandparents, so on and so forth.  Essentially, you are sick and tired of eating rich Chinese food by the end of the first week.  I can’ figure out which is better since Christmas meal usually sends me into a coma an hour into it while Chinese food means you get hungry within an hour after your meal.

I remember waiting for snow to fall…it usually didn’t but midnight mass at a church I attended once a year, christmas carols, and bells seem to be the thing for Saint Nick.  Saint Buddha…explosions…people demanding red pocket money, the smell of incense, more explosions around, no music…

The night has been relatively quiet thus far.  It is really nice.  I’ve been swamped with work lately but they say anything worth doing means lots of work.  I’ve been adjusting the last couple of years from the lifestyle I got accustomed to in Corporate America.  FIlm making, bar tending, house husbanding, and traveling meant I needed to shift gears and shifting back was quick difficult.  I’ve switched back to my old self of waking up early, working late, anticipating the best, but planning for the worst but have added this new life work balance idea.  It is still a work in progress.

They used to preach this crap at Ernst and Young and it really was a lot of hogwash, but in reality, I’d like to be able to mix those things together, Life and Work, so I don’t have to kill myself ta a job again, only to leave for another 4 years, only to return again…it just doesn’t make sense.  You should be able to enjoy your work, enjoy your friends, family, and life, and not be made to feel guilty about having your cake and eating it too. 

I never understood that phrase.  Why get the cake if you can’t eat it?  Wouldn’t the idea come across better by say, "You can’t have cake, and have pie too!"  "Apples and Oranges…can’t have them both."  Simply put…"Don’t be greedy!"  At this age…Im going to be greedy and say, we all deserve to have a life without having to sacrifice dedication to work and vice versa. 

Happy Chinese New Year or as they say here in China, Spring Festival.  The country for the most part has been off of work which for me is very strange.  Even the banks are closed as Chinese citizens take one of I think 3 weeks off in the year. 

The city really surprised me.  I am not kidding when I say, people are lighting small mortars outside my apartment right now.  The continuous explosions outside my window are both beautiful, frightful, and now five days into the holiday, ANNOYING.  I have never been in war but I would imagine it sounding something like this.  Boom boom.  Crackle crackle.  Boom boom.  BADOOM!  Crackle crackle.  It is a mix of the small noisy fireworks and the mortar like sounds of shells exploding in mid air.  It goes on for about 5 hours a night.  I’ve seen these 4-6 inch diameter mortars being launched off bridges, highways, in the middle of major intersections, rooftops, balconies, and right now, about 10 feet away from my building.  I fired an M-16 once…it was quiet compared to this.

I went to the Emperor’s Summer Palace this past  Monday and Tuesday in Cheng De.  We should have known from the name, it is renowned for being a very cold place, even in the summer.  Going in the winter makes very little sense but we went..froze, then came home.  Wow.  The four star hotel…it made me long for those days staying in the Day’s Inn as I drove across country. 

On the way there, we saw a flipped car, two dead people, and an ambulance rushing to the scene about 15 minutes later.  I wonder if those people had survived the crash, would they have been able to last until help arrived.  Driving here is just too unpredictable between people crossing against the lights, cars driving on shoulders, and stopping abruptly in the middle of he highway when their exit has arrived, only to swerve across three lanes to get to the exit 20 feet away.  SCAAARY!

If it isn’t the cars you are afraid of…keep your windows and sunroof closed.  We saw a trucker open his cab on the side of the road, and PEE into traffic.  He must have had to go…it arched from the shoulder, all the way to the middle lane!  Wouldn’t it have made sense to pee towards the woods on the other side of the truck!

Well, that is my Chinese New Year’s report…more to come but it’s been super duper busy. 

Some thoughts that plague my mind today.  Does Chicken Soup help patients with the Bird Flu get better?  Can they not contract the Bird Flu from eating bad chicken?  How about the poor fellows who had to kill the bird in order to make the soup.  Are we infecting more people trying to cure ourselves?  I’m sick by the way.  Fever…sore throat, headache…tummy ache.  Which brings me to…


I just moved into my apartment in Beijing and I live on the 15th floor.  Or so I thought until somebody reminded me that there wasn’t a 4th, 13th or 14th floor on my building which puts me on the 12th FLOOR!  Man, I got cheated by 3 floors!  For those who don’t know, 4 is an unlucky number and I suppose 14 is just as bad since it has 4 and 13…i thik they threw it in there for all the westerners in my building.

I landed in Hong Kong last week to take care of some business.  People here are freezing, they wear fur coats and fleece and it is like 50 degrees here.  Now…ordinarily, that would not be very cold but sitting in these stone buildings with no internal heating whatsoever, I AM STONE COLD!  It is actually colder in here than outside. I find myself opening windows in order to stay warm.  This place is 
backwards I tell you but then I hear that some places in Europe have no Air Conditioners and the temp goes up as high as 100 Degrees.  Whoa.  Days like these…I miss the smelly steam flowing from the sewers of New York.  At least the sidewalk and my apartment were warm and by the way, people didn’t have to be reminded not to spit when indoors.

I was happy to see this.  The stores here in Hong Kong use Western Manneuins which I think is funny.  Some guy out there manufactures these things in China and they all look like him and his friends.  Why don’t we have our own.   Alas…I found one…except he is stuck on the Highway in China.  These are used to alert people of construction and I’ve seen a bunch of them used in conjunction with an empty police care.

I was thinking about the Skiers Code of Conduct this week when riding in a taxi in Beijing.  I thought, the way they drive is very similar to skiing.  The responsibility of avoiding danger lies with the person uphill.  Hence why nobody uses mirrors here.  The problem is of course, they don’t use brakes well either.  Maybe I was wrong…they only use that one rule…the rest you can throw into the trash.

• Always stay in control, and be able to stop or avoid other people or objects. (They need to work on these here in China.  If you are visually a Westerner, they will avoid you like the plague for fear of getting in trouble.  If you are Chinese looking, like me…you run for your life, stay on the sidewalk when you cross the street and use fellow pedestrians as a buffer zone should the car racing towards you with bad brakes fail to stop)

• People ahead of you have the right of way. It is your responsibility to avoid them.  (This rule, they have down pat.  When in Beijing, observe as people harly ever get into accidents cutting one another off as people back off…even when they are squeezed by a guy cutting in on your tail gate party with the car in front of you)

• You must not stop where you obstruct a trail, or are not visible from above. (This is not so obvious here in Beijing.  It seems the rule is, when unsure about whether the current highway exit is yours, stop, block the exit, lit a cigarette to help you decide then blindly merge back with the highway)

• Whenever starting downhill or merging into a trail, look uphill and yield to others. (They count on the other rule about downhill drivers having right of way…why bother looking back.  Gun it and trust me…they’ll let you in or stop in time.)

• Always use devices to help prevent runaway equipment. (One could argue that every car being driven in Beijing is a runaway equipment.  I’ve never seen so many bald tires, faulty breaks, noisy muffles, and unused side view mirros before in my life!)

• Observe all posted signs and warnings. Keep off closed trails and out of closed areas.(Unless you actually understand the history of China, these street signs make no sense.  There are 9 gates of the city, 5 rings, maybe 6 rings, each area and street has a directional version of itself, north, south, east west, and also center and outside…bicycle lanes, they are no exclusive, turn right on red…only i you can do it at 30MPH and dodging the hordes of people waiting to cross the street)

• Prior to using any lift, you must have the knowledge and ability to load, ride and unload safely. (I can’t wait to get my license here to see just what I really need to know before stepping into a car.  Keys and Ignition…Check.  Gas…Check.  Radio…Check.  Mirror…check…I look great.  Brakes…who cares, Time is money!

Alright…enough of the madness for today.  Cheers all!

Even I have to admit that my last blog entry was lame.  Call it what you will but blogging requires plenty of practice and I haven’t blogged in lord knows how long.  Even my hits have dropped of making me wonder…how do I get your attention again?  To give you a little insight into how I am feeling, this picture describes it all!

I thought I would share some of the wonderful things I’ve discovered here in China…yes folks, I am in China now…not Hong Kong.  The journey continues!
  I was watching these bootleg dvds…i know…shame on me but it isn’t like I can get the real thing here…well, maybe I can but the store is so far away and the guy Ping on the corner was looking like he could use my hard earned Chinese dollar (which is called a Yuan or RMB).  Five of them to be exact.

So the adventure goes, the movies I bought all featured sharing the experience with the audience, laughter and all.  The subtitles were the main feature though.  Apparently they translate from the english dialogue into Chinese and then use a computer to translate it back to English.  What on screen is a simple, "Yo, what’s up?" becomes, "How are you doing my good friend!"   Oh well.

Yes people, that says, Fing the bamboo shoot burns the sparerib. And the other one reads, The Plum f’s the east a meat.  Now try to order that at your local chinese take out place!!!

I think…NO, I am certain that I have seen more Ferrari, Porches and cars I cannot afford live in person this year than I have ever in my entire life including the times I have seen them in magazines.  It is amazing what people spend
there money on here.  This one on the left is from Thailand.  I guess if I were to have any of these fancy cars though…this one on the right is a ferrari I saw on the streets of Hong Kong but I like the red interior of this puppy…

I
‘ll leave you all with these pictures of Christmas in Asia…on the left is a the blue christmas in Bangkok and on the right is Hong Kong, talk about last minute shoppers!

From my home to yours, a very belated Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Is this animal cruelty or what?  I love it!

It’s been more than three years and the transition seems to be ongoing.  Working outside of the "normal" suit and tie brings me great joy but it can be challenging some times.  At times I miss the stability of health care, a steady pay check and having somebody give me a project in something I was hired to do.  Now a days, it is all a hustle I suppose.  We all do it, but it is on my own dollar and time. 

I’ve landed in Beijing now…life is pretty good here.  My Chinese is improving and I’ve fallen in love with living abroad.  The world is so much bigger than before and yet, it is still so tiny.  The Taiwan earthquake disrupted my life, and continues to do so each day as they try to repair those internet cables.  GRRRR!

I guess i should blog more…and will do so now that I have some space.  Boy, am I rusty…i don’t even know what to write about…any suggestions?

So they have this place here in Hong Kong called, "The Flying Pan".  I think I blogged about it a while ago but it is a play on word.  It was supposed to be the FRYING PAN but the locals couldn’t pronounce the R and it came out as an L.  Well…i can understand this but my friend got this in the email the other day.  Please note that I changed the companies name with ABC COMPANY and I have made no other corrections to it.

Dear Customer,

Thank you for contecting ABC COMPANY Customer Care Centre about enquiry.

Answer:
Regarding to your enquery, we would like inform you that ABC COMPANY have not provide a such software use with Mac computer and you can try contact Apple Computer for more information about it. Your understand is high appreciated!ly

Please contact us again if we can be of further assistance and also visit our website at www.ABC COMPANY.com or contact our Customer Care Centre at
tel.: (852) 6666 6666 for more information and support on our products.

Thank you & regards,
/Alan Leung
ABC COMPANY Customer Care Center

Okay…so when I read this, I initially ha ha ha, super funny only to realize that when I speak chinese here or in China…I sound exactly the same to them.  Scary.  I wonder if somebody out there is blogging about me and our taxi ride conversation.  Eck.

Here is my photo for this blog.  I left New York almost one year ago and from these two bags I have lived my life.  Amazing to think that I have only added a small dog and another carry on bag to this pile.  Eh.  I wonder if I would throw away everything when I go home.  Why do I need any of it…i haven’t this last year.  I wonder how much of te stuff I have if even used.  I tink I could probably throw away a carry on bag size of stuff here.  Wow.

WARNING: This blog may be offensive to some and amusing to others.  Continue reading at your own risk and no comments about how disgusting I may be…   

My boys all grows up!  Yes…the little one has found a new pleasure.  What once was this cute adorable rascal running around eating everything in sight, has blossomed into Deuce Bigalow.  He’s grown up…and had lost that glow of being a puppy…i blame puberty.

Yes, our little dog Genghis grew some cajones!  They were cute initially but they grew in size over time until they were little M&M’s.  They don’t look like much here but they really changed a lot.  His face matured, his demeanor became aggressive and he began to bark something he never did.

His mornings began to fill with excursions with different play mates.  First the blue pillow…and then the green one.  Never in the sight of one another…he even started sweet talking my arm.  At points, he didn’t know what to do with his fifth leg and began barking at it.

Still…i was tempted to keep him intact.  Even after I convinced my girlfriend’s little brother to desex their dog with all the right arguments, I thought…we can do this…breed more Genghises.  He is so well mannered and so cute…all we need is to find him a mate.  It was too much in the end.  He lost his cuteness and thought…time to stop this.

This decision was tough but two weeks ago we did the dirty deed.  It was sad to see him have to wear a cone but also really funny.  He was running into everything with it.  The fun lasted as long as his BO was in check but without his weekly shower, he STUNK!  Cute is only as good as a good smelling doggie.

He did do some cool tricks with the cone though.  Catch had a whole new meaning for us.  The best part was he had no clue where the ball was and was waling around looking for it.  It’s like when you leave your glasses on the top of your head and go, where did they go?


His ears are always so pronounced and we wondered how he would look without them one day.  We came up with a great composite.

It’s been a few days now and he is returning back to his old good natured self.  No more aggression, no more marking, no more humping, and he is no longer lethargic after his periodic humping sessions.  Best of all…he is looking cuter than ever.  Not as cute as when he first arrived but very handsome.  He learned a couple of new tricks…Stand Up…play dead (he knows it as "BANG!") and fetch.  I’m debating what the next trick should be.  Roll over?  Fetch me a beer?  Go get a job?  For now…he is the perfect dog…albeit a bit tiny.  He loves so much it is tough to simply say, like.  By far the best dog and friend I’ve had in a long time.